When couples struggle in a marriage, they often think divorce is the only option. For some, that heart-wrenching decision is the right one. But many people don’t give enough thought to how much a divorce can impact them.
Here are 6 questions to ask yourself if you’re unsure about staying in your marriage.
6 Questions to Ask if You’re Thinking About Divorce
1. Do you know what makes a healthy marriage?
Everyone’s definition of a healthy marriage will vary, but a good place to start is when a couple works as allies or partners—two individuals working toward a common goal.
2. Do you and your spouse communicate effectively?
Many people have difficulty sharing their feelings and needs. If you find yourselves disconnecting emotionally, turning away from each other, or avoiding tough conversations, that could be a red flag.
3. Do you keep having the same arguments?
Arguments are a natural part of any relationship, but if they recur with no eventual solution, you may be setting yourself up to fail.
4. Have you contributed to the problem and the solution?
When problems exist, many couples play the blame game instead of taking an honest look at themselves. Some questions to ask yourself include:
- Do I avoid, blame, or attack when handling conflict?
- Do I communicate well? Am I defensive or overly critical?
- What does my partner need from me?
- Am I meeting my spouse’s needs? If not, why not?
- Do I show love and appreciation?
5. Have you tried marriage therapy?
Communication is essential to a happy marriage, and sometimes it takes an outside perspective to start the conversation. Before making a rash decision, many couples find it helpful to seek help from a licensed marriage counselor. You may too.
6. Do you understand the impact divorce will have on your loved ones?
Divorce can leave a trail of heartache and devastation in its wake. Bonds between families break and innocent children are left to deal with the destruction for years to come. In fact, many If you have children, it’s important to realize their futures are at stake as well. Take the time to consider whether divorcing is a better solution than trying to make it work.
Divorce happens to be the answer for many couples, but it doesn’t necessarily have to be yours. If you’re struggling with issues like suspected infidelity or child abuse, She Spies Private Eye can consult with you about your options before you file for divorce. The truth can make the decision a little easier.